OBSESSED

I just read this book "Obsessed" by Ted Dekker. I highly recommend it. Aside from the fact that it is a hooker, seeing as I read it in less than two days, it has great themes. I was very inspired by a character on there that was a leader among the women she was with, in hope. I was reminded that one of the biggest threats to satan is our hope, our faith and trust in God. He tries to bring us down with fear, it is his weapon and he will use it at all costs to keep us not only fearing the worst, but doubting ourselves and others. If we let it it will hold us hostage in a despair that paralyzes. We are but pawns in a game of manipulation. However, he can't touch us if we are firm in our hope in God. It was so exciting today walking through campus thinking about the promise of God's redemption of his people, thinking of the day he overcomes evil for good (plus it was absolutely beautiful outside, and although the world is fallen God's glory can be seen all through nature!). Satan may meddle in our minds, attitudes, and emotions, but it is up to us as to whether or not we are affected by it.

Two Days...

Spring break...in two days...Colorado...that is all.

Our Choice

"You're as full as you want to be." That was a quote in regards to the holy spirit. The lady that spoke at ground zero read it to us. I didn't get around to mentioning it last time but I get to now, yay :) It is by Jonathan Edwards. Interestingly enough we just learned about him in my history of religion class. He played a significant role in the first Great Awakening. He also wrote a piece called "Sinners in the Hands of an Angry God". I have got to get ahold of that some time and read it. I don't know if this quote is from it or not but anyway.

The quote really struck my attention. It is so true. Everyone has just as much opportunity to be completely filled but we choose not to, I've done it myself. In fact, I think I am still doing it. As unfortunately honest as that is it's true. There are just some things in life that when it comes down to it, are not easy to let go of. I'm not trying to justify this problem, but explain. I have to decide that I am indeed going to completely let go, scary thought considering I have this issue with trust. While I love change, there are just also some things of commonality that are not fun to let go of. I'm going to though.

Weeeelllll, while we're on the brutally honest tract... I might as well vent about something else that is troubling. See, since I have this issue with trust, it means that it takes me a really REALLY long time to open up to people. And actually, I usually don't. However, what a relief when there are those few that I do trust and know me, because there is so much freedom. Well, basically almost the only ones that have the upmost of that priveledge is my family (yeah, duh). It isn't so much that I'm insecure of who I am, I know who I am and actually happen to really like myself, something, sadly many can not say. However, I am complex, ecclectic, hard to understand, and for the record, can't spell to save my life, i'm sure you'll notice that :). So I spend so much time trying to watch the trail of how who I am is affecting everyone that I get insanely tired of it and find it a waste. So when it gets to the place where you don't have to explain yourself all the time it is beyond wonderful. Anyway, my brother is moving away. Yep, he's moving away. I didn't think it would affect me so much, I even almost went to a different college because I wanted that chance for my own identity, funny thing with twins, you'd think there was only one of us. But he is a good friend, and I have been trying to avoid thinking about not being able to just run over and hang out with he and his wife. In a week I'll be helping them move across the country and miss them a lot. The truth is bound to take its toll here very soon. You know its funny you never think growing up is that big of a deal, or that it will be hard at all, and then it's time...

The Fellowship of the Blazing Hearts

"Ground Zero" was tonight. An evangalist came and spoke about hearts ablaze and praying for the nation. She mentioned something that was sad to me, and I had wondered, but never had anyone actually say it. She has been to all these colleges in forty days and the ones with the "dimmest" hearts were the Christian ones. Thats messed up. However, she spoke of a book called "Fellowship of the Burning Hearts" or was it blazing, i can't remember. Anyway, they committed to pray an hour each day, an hour praying, reading the Bible, spending time with God. She also pushed us to do the same, I made a commitment, and want to be part of the fellowship. It would be AMAZING for revival and a heart for God running rampant in our nation, if it starts in our generation, so be it. Pray Pray Pray Pray PRAY!! She kept speaking of that. Honestly I can't say I'm the hugest fan. I think for me it was always because I would be direct in my prayers, and of few words, so it was hard for me to do it for an extended period of time. What do you say? How do you keep your mind from wondering off? Well, I'm about to find out. I encourage you to consider doing the same..think of the power behind prayer...

A friend did this and I thought it seemed like an interesting idea so I'm doing it as well. Check out the link below, let me know what you think :)

What do you see when you see me?

"We must be active not passive, we must learn to battle in spiritual warfare, we must die to the flesh and to our emotions. Any good human emotion will never cast out any negative human emotion."

Wow, can I just say powerful message tonight? I have more thoughts, but for now a migraine is calling me to be horizontal. Good thoughts though, good thoughts. That last one especially, really stood out to me.